Monday, November 29, 2010

Fatherhood: One month in

Father and Son
Originally uploaded by LugerLA
One month. One thing we are agreed upon that a baby's state at the one month mark is not the fault of the parents (of course, assuming survival), which is why the one month point is traditionally the time you publicly celebrate. That being said, there are certain nice-to-have's at the one month point.

1. Baby is healthy (In a newborn there is only one measure. Gaining weight)
2. Baby crying is bounded.
3. Parents are doing better than walking zombies.

At this point, baby is doing a good job gaining weight, as we look at the strains in anything labeled 3 months. The official pronouncement from the pediatrician is "thriving"

He has quickly determined that there are other ways of getting attention other then crying. Although there are days that he tries that method quicker then others.

He is feeding on a three hour cycle. Most days. And some days it gets freaky (meaning you can set your clock on it). Of course there are some days (growth spurts. Too much energy) where he does not get anywhere close.

Some initial thoughts.

1. The runner's reminder, we are experiments of one, seems to apply here. I have a healthy disrespect for any expert who proclaims the One True Way to ____.

2. I've noticed that on, every baby book has readers who complain that the book is too belief in one true way. The majority of the books I have read are considerably more nuanced then their detractors (or most enthusiastic supporters) give credit for. Mind you, there is one book I consider an exception to this.

3. Baby feeds and eats and goes back to sleep a lot better when we get to him before he starts crying. It helps that he usually gives us other cues. But I don't easily take the advice that we should let the baby cry. At least not a newborn. (I don't think that newborns are deceptive. But I am aware that that time will come.)

4. We are given the understanding that a baby's personality changes over time, regardless of what the parents do. We'll take what we have as long as it lasts.
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