Parenting month 100: rockets and wands

The highlight of the month was a vacation to Florida. Our vacation was in 2 Acts: Space Coast and Orlando.

On the Space Coast we were on Cocoa Beach.  Known for its surfing beaches and for its proximity to Kennedy Space Center.  We spent time on the beach.

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morning run on Cocoa Beach along with soengham 1 and Shim Jun forms @wexford_ata #theplacetobe #tkdfamily

A post shared by Louis L 🔑 (@lluang70) on Jun 24, 2019 at 1:08pm PDT

and did obligatory side kicks and forms

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Morning sidekick on the beach @wexford_ata #theplacetobe #tkdfamily

A post shared by Louis L 🔑 (@lluang70) on Jun 24, 2019 at 1:10pm PDT

We also woke up at 2 AM to watch a launch of a Falcon Heavy.  Well, T and I did.  and the rest of the family got woken up by the rumble of engines and the bangs of the sonic booms.

Launch of Falcon Heavy from Kennedy Space Center as seen from Cocoa Beach

The next day we went to Kennedy Space Center

Space Shuttle Atlantis at Kennedy Space Center 

Going through the tubes of the mock space station

At the controls of a shuttle

Saturn V engine

Entryway to Kennedy Space Center Visitor's Center

Part 2 of the trip was Orlando, where the highlight was Universal Studios Wizarding World of Harry Potter. T got a wand that he used to cast spells, which is what the majority of the day was spent doing.

On the bridge to Hogsmead

Talking to a wizard to pick a wand just for him

Riding Hagrid's Cycle

Casting a spell

The dragon at Gringott's Bank.  Underneath was T's first roller Coaster

Diagon Alley

Casting a rain spell at Diagon Alley

Making water in Diagon Alley

T also got to go on his first roller coasters.   One at Diagon Alley, one in Hogsmead, and a Transformer's and a Fast and Furious rides.

We think this was a  trip worth remembering.

Cancun family vacation

We had a rare pure family vacation (meaning the trip did not include visiting friends, family, or other business). With two kids (preschooler and baby) and two grandparents, we went the easy way out and took a trip to a family-friendly all-inclusive resort in Cancun, Mexico. The benefits of an all-inclusive resort is that very little thinking or planning is required. The knock against these sort of things is that they are completely removed from the host area, which is true. But some memories and thoughts:

Touching the sea for the first time in Cancun, Mexico

1.  Using an all-inclusive resort made it possible to have a vacation while we are caring for two grandparents, and two small children. No worries about getting food, everything is in short walking distance, and we don't have to worry about getting lost in the general traffic of everyday life. And right now, that is important.  Someday, when T and A are older and going to different cities is meaningful, we will have that kind of vacation.

2.  We think that most of the staff are recruited from Quintana Roo>. And a large fraction of the guests were Mexican. So the resort we were at was not a Little America that I thought that these places would be.  We had T do greetings and simple questions in Spanish (e.g. hola, buenos dias, buenos tardes, __ por favor, donde es ___, gracias, de nada, numbers) And staff responded properly to a four year old American using Spanish. For T, who learns Spanish in pre-school, that means that he experienced hearing and using Spanish as a working language, not a memorization exercise that pre-school Spanish is. Bonus, there were a couple of times when S and T were interacting with housekeeping (which were not generally bilingual) and T knew just enough Spanish to get the point across.

3.  We provided the staff great amusement with my high-school Spanish. Sometimes, when the staff recognized me (or T) we would have our entire exchange in Spanish. We noticed this would happen when there was another staff observing in surprise, and the staff we interacted it would give them an amused smile at their surprise. This has the obvious implication that if my not-significantly-different-from-zero Spanish was cause of notice and amusement, the typical level of Spanish for an American is actually zero.

4.  T is still the very cautious and generally shy self. He had a few scary (for a four year old) experiences over the trip. He slipped and got stuck on a bunk bed ladder, he got turned on a water slide and went underwater, and he was on a jetski (being used as a lighter to another boat) punching its way through waves and up on a beach. So we had many conversations on how being brave was doing things that were scary, and not stopping even when things go wrong.

5.  For both T and A, the best part of the trip is clearly the fact that they had mommy and daddy close at hand for large parts of every day.  Frankly, they would have enjoyed this if we stayed at home too. But they also saw us interacting with the hotel staff. And (especially since we were trying to get T to practice his Spanish) doing so with courtesy, even when there were problems with the room and travel. (ok, if you asked T, he probably would say that parasailing and always-available ice cream were pretty significant too.)

6.  A is a very expressive one-year old. That means she babbles, dances, looks at people, and acts and speaks with intent. Very clear and specific intent. In a one-year old, this is seriously cute (and we hope this means we will skip the worst of the tantrum stage). But another part of us thinks that if she is like this now, just wait until she actually has language skills. As I recall, in daycare, there was a clear hierarchy based on who had language skills (they could communicate with each other, and communicate their desires to the teachers). T was on the bottom end of this until he was 3 1/2 or so. A is going to be at the upper end.

7.  T definitely recognized that he has to compete for attention. And it is very hard to compete for attention with an expressive one-year old. Especially when you are naturally an introvert. Knowing a little bit of Spanish helped in this weekend with the staff and the other Mexican guests, a preschooler trying to speak a second language is pretty cute too.

8.  We somehow chose a resort that was also hosting a Korean church conference.That was something you don't experience on the average vacation.

9.  Grandpa and T (and daddy) went parasailing (which involved using a jetski to get to and from the boat).  Grandpa was very happy at this little adventure.

We are glad we did this. Grandparents can probably only do this for a limited number of years, and the kids are not in a position to appreciate anything more complex. When our kids get older, they will better appreciate things that are more complex, more adventurous, or more immersive.  But this is a good start.

Parenting Month 38: Bargaining, charm (and guile)

Looking at baby chicks at the Museum of Science and Industry

A recent New York Times article looks at a study of violent adults that tracked people from when they were toddlers.  It finds that violence as adults is very similar to violence as toddlers, except that most toddlers determine over time that they can use bargaining and charm to get what they want and they do not need to resort to violence.  This is good as we get more capable in inflicting violence as we get older.  We took a family vacation this past month, so it provided a good look at how T handles himself socially.  At home does not provide nearly as good a look at this since of the four people he has to interact with (1) Lau-lau (grandma) and (2) mom impose their greater will on him and they are mostly resistant to charm, (3) lau-yeh (grandpa) has clearly lost the matchup between grandpa and grandson, and (4) dad (me) takes on the role of father as described by Amy Chua's husband, which is occasionally manifesting as a force of nature when needed so T has definite limits on his opportunities to express his will.  On our family road trip this month we had numerous opportunities of observations with random playground playmates, interactions with kids at nature centers and museums, an arranged playdate with friends, and meeting with cousins as he transitions from being a toddler to a preschooler.

Making a Merry-go-round with cousins

1. Bargaining - we took an overnight stop at a town along the way and went to a local mall to give T someplace to run around in.  This mall had a playground centered on one slide (as opposed to our local mall that has 5 slides), which means the kids are forced to interact if they want to use the slide and its attached fort.  We saw him becoming into one of the kids who had to try to encourage the slow kids to move forward and out of the way so that everyone else could use the slide instead of being one of the slow kids.
2. Charm - Taking pictures while a docent was showing us through a feeding of  turtles.  Taking turns with the other preschooler who was with us.
3. Charm - We took a stop at the Peggy Norbaert Nature Museum.  At one point there was a 17 month old girl who was watching him work an exhibit. And he was trying to show her what to look for in the exhibit. Later, he was showing her the box turtles (that he had seen earlier in our visit.)
4. Charm - Teaching another preschooler how to work a water exhibit at the Nature museum.
5. Guile - At his cousin's house, he was drawing on a chalkboard.  But the only word he knows to write is his name, and his cousin objected to T writing his name on his cousin's chalkboard. So his cousin erased it.  With his hand.  At that point, T pointed out that his cousin's hand needed to be washed. And while his cousin washed his hand, T proceeded to write his name on the freshly erased chalkboard.
6. Bargaining - He went on a playdate that included some 12-15 children (I lost count)  He was the third kid there (the host plus one other guest) He quickly proceeded to alternate play a toy that involved putting something like a coin into the slot (actually, I think that this one really counts as the girl taking charge and including him in her play)
7. Cute (worth a mention even though it was not one of the categories) - At one point, someone saw a squirrel outside the back door and T along with two other kids crowded into the door to look at it outside the window (I hope someone got a picture of it, because it was too good)
8. Bargaining - At a party with his cousins, he wanted to re-enact a cartoon episode where the main characters construct a merry-go-round.  But his cousins had no idea what cartoon he was talking about.  Eventually, they found something round, and animals to go around on it.
9. Guile - At the museum, he took advantage of the fact that he has a long attention span to let someone else try something at an exhibit, and got the exhibit back to himself when that boy was done (and found he was not interested)
10. Charm - Expressing excitement when other people are interacting with exhibits at the Museum of Science and Industry.
11. Charm - Being polite (saying, please, thank you, your welcome) while taking pictures at the museum.
12. Bargaining - Trying to get other kids at a play area to play a different way in one of the activity areas (this did not work, but he tried)
13. Charm - Showing a little girl how to play in one of the bouncing play areas.  He did this with a couple of kids in a few of the activity areas. 
14. Bargaining - Telling a boy who went down the slide ahead of him "Watch out, I'm coming!" while standing at the top of the slide and waving his arms to encourage him to move out of the way.
15. Charm - At a rest stop, pointing out the direction to the bathroom to all of the other toddlers and pre-schoolers. 
16. Charm - On the way out from the museum, wanting to show a group of preschoolers on the way in around the dinosaur exhibit.

Of course, he is a preschooler, and playing with toddlers and preschoolers does lead to use of physical force.  He is big and strong enough that it is not easy for another preschooler to push him aside, and one instance of a bigger kid pulling off his hat led to him chasing the kid down and snatching the hat back.  But we have wondered if he would hold his own in the rough and tumble since the day care staff have observed that he does not get into fights. We are glad that it is not because he won't stand up for himself, it is probably because he does not have the attachment for things that would motivate him to fight.

Controlling a robot at the Museum of Science and Industry

He still generally takes a while to socialize. Although by observation, a large part of it is that he has a long attention span, and generally what happens is that he doing something while other kids come and go around him. During the play date we turned off one toy to get him to get out of a corner and interact with the other kids. Another parent at the playdate made the comment that instead of contributing to chaos he lets the chaos of toddler and pre-school play flow around him. While his daycare staff notes he generally does not play with the others around him, they also note that it is not because he is antagonistic (which is the usual problem) or disinterested, but because he is focused on what he is doing or playing at the moment rather than moving from thing to thing with everyone else.

What we really got out of this vacation was a lot of time to observe T interacting with his peers, both those familiar and also strangers. While we get the observations of day care staff, it helps to see it for ourselves.  While, unfortunately, the realities of the education system means he will have a problem with evaluations for a while, we like knowing that the reality is that he is navigating his path in dealing with his peers and developing skills to cope that will grow into the future.

Playing with a balloon

Parenting Month 34: Where did mommy and daddy go?

Who is not in the picture?

This month's grand event. Mommy and daddy took a vacation without T. For five days! This was not our first time without him, but the last time was only for two nights. So we are increasing the length :-) Now, we like T and all, and we even took a vacation with him earlier in the summer. But it is nice to have a few days without him. And healthy for him. Based on reports from grandma and grandpa, he did all right. But he was happy to see us when we got back :-)

In other news, he is continuing to be more talkative.  All of the teachers at the day care report he talks to them (he used to only talk to a chosen few).  And he interacts more with the other kids.  A day care highlight:  the teachers drew a hopscotch grid, and he ended up teaching the other kids what to do on it.  Another highlight.  The day care got some new toys including kitchen toys.  And the teachers did not know what some of them were.  Until T showed them what a steamer and buns were for.

Mommy is starting tiger parenting in earnest.  Yes, we thought that was already going on, but now we are looking at future kindergarden, and what it takes to get in.  In particular, we are thinking about getting him in earlier (because he missed the cutoff) so he would be one of the youngest kids in the year instead of one of the oldest.  In the U.S., the cutoff date has been creeping earlier and earlier over the years, because parents have been trying to hold their kids back and entering later.  So this means doing what New York parents all do and prepare the kids for the tests.  (supposedly the tests are cultural neutral tests of intelligence.  After taking a look at some sample questions, I strongly disagree with this assessment.  It is biased towards kids whose parents prepare them to take cultural neutral tests of intelligence.  Because I cannot imagine a four year old understanding these questions unless that child has seen those types of questions before and knows how to answer them. i.e. they have to already know the form of answer that goes with that form of question]. Daddy is slightly amused by the whole thing actually, and has taken advantage of it by buying games.  Starting with dominoes (which are good for matching and counting) and Bananagrams (think scrabble tiles without the board or points).  Since mommy does not play games, daddy thinks he can raise a playing partner.

Reading instructions on how to make a truck

The other new thing is going to the Kids workshops at Home Depot and Lowe's.  While they are advertised as for 5 and up, in reality younger kids often go as well.  After much observation of grandpa and daddy over the summer, and practice using Handy Manny and the Melissa and Doug tool box, T can reliably hit a nail on the head with a hammer, which is the principle skill required for these kids workshops.  The only problem is that he does not have the strength for it, so it takes a lot of hits (and daddy is there to finish off the nail).  Between both stores (Home Depot is once a month, Lowe's is twice a month) we figure this means an activity and a toy two weekends a month. :-)

Next month.  Back to school for mommy and daddy.  Lots of time with grandma and grandpa at their new home.  And more talking and interaction at day care.

Trip notes: China 2009

An account of my first trip to China to meet my wife's family in Tianjin and friends in Beijing and Shanghai.


Tianjin
Beijing
Shangai
Tianjin Pt 2
Quotes
Conversation topics

I arrived in Beijing on Friday afternoon. On arrival, the plane was inspected by health officials who inspected everyone using a hand held temperature sensor. Those who were flagged where then inspected using a second sensor, which I assume is more accurate. Only after everyone was inspected was the plane cleared to depart. With the swine flu scare in full swing (in the past week Japan had reported over 100 cases) there were three more checkpoints with temperature sensors manned by health inspectors before we reached immigration and customs.

S was waiting for me out of customs, and we went downstairs to take the Tianjin bus. We took that to the Tianjin bus station, and met S's father there who picked us up.

Tianjin

In Tianjin, we spent a lot of time walking around the neighborhood. Her family still lives near the Tianjin Conservatory of Music, which was the center of both her life and her mother (who worked there). So we went to markets in the area, her school (all three campuses), and various shops (including a tea shop her mother frequents, where we had two sets of tastings to pick teas to bring back.) S and her mother are in some pictures on the Conservatory wall of fame in the courtyard.



Tianjin traffic is pretty bad. It is not that it is heavy (Bangkok is much heavier), but the drivers are very aggressive, in the disfunctional Boston way (meaning not the New York aggressiveness that has obvious purpose of people trying to get somewhere, but aggressiveness that is clearly sub-optimal because every expression of aggressiveness probably slows down everyone, including the driver jumping in.) For example, red lights are merely suggestions, drivers tend to view pushing across an intersection against a red light as a legitimate possibility. Which causes cross traffic to stop when they reach him, and invariably the crosser gets trapped in the intersection as cross traffic goes through before he makes it across, trapping everyone else. Also, pedestrians cross anywhere, anytime, secure in the knowledge that Chinese law is punative against drivers who touch pedestrians. In contrast to, say Bangkok where I think every pedestrian is fully aware that they don't count for all that much against a car.

The signs are somewhat odd. Many of the public advisory messages consist of a picture and text. But the picture is of what NOT to do, and you have to read the text to realize this. So you have pictures of cars hitting each other, drivers and phones, drinks, etc. Although my favorite sign does utilize the universal circle and line symbol for No. It is a symbol of a horn, which I find exceptionally funny at the Tianjin Conservatory or the Tianjin Music Hall.


This one is actually in Shanghai, but there were such signs in Tianjin as well.

We visited S grandmother in the hospital, multiple aunties and uncles. A few cousins.

One morning we went to the morning market nearby where the W family lives. At that hour in the morning, that road is mostly closed. In addition, there are some roads that are closed to vehicles, which leads to a large pack of bicycles like the old days.

In the market you can get all sorts of things. We got car seat covers, socks, some herbs, and breakfast. There was all sorts of fruits, vegetables, fish, meats, housewear, and one guy who seemed to have assorted everything.

One of the more famous restaurants is Go Buli (the english on the sign says 'Go Believe') It is known for its steamed buns. The story of the restaurant is the founder was universally poorly regarded, and even the dogs ('go') did not ('bu') look at him ('li'). But, it has become successful, and these restaurants are found throughout the country and Tianjin is known for its steamed buns.

Beijing

We took the bullet train to Beijing. It takes about 1/2 hour and arrives at the Beijing-South railway station. Which somehow lacks an associated subway station. Very inconvenient. We took a bus to the nearest train station, then went to the Forbidden City, under the theory that we should do touristy things on our own instead of subjecting our friends in the area to such things. We took lots of pictures, including a close-up of the Mao portrait at the front wall of the Forbidden City, which seemed to attract the attention of a nearby guard who was apparently satisfied that I was not taking pictures of anything else as we went in.





We had lunch in Dongsi, the neighborhood north and east of the Forbidden City. We were pointed that way by a tea shop worker where we called friends. We went into a little side street (Houjie) and found a noodle place to have noodles.

S's friend lives by the Today Museum of Art, so we went there to hang out at their place. CL's husband, Chen Leiji, played the Guqin at the 2008 Olympic Opening Ceremonies during the Scroll of Chinese Paintings segment.



We had dinner in a restaurant at Apartment #8 along with CL and family, JY (from Northwestern) joined us as well as CL's friends. Very good seafood. Interesting dishes of varying quality from ok to very good.


We stayed at Motel168 by Andinglu station. The next morning, we got buns made at a street stall right next door. Next we went to the subway to go to Olympic Park. But first, we decided to take a detour in a small park along the way. Which turned out to be a fairly long park following a small river that ran through the center of the city. We saw many nanny's with babies and retirees. There was also a saxaphone player, an erhu player, some people doing tai chi, and one group that took over a pavilian to play chinese instruments and sing opera.



We took the train to Olympic park. Line 8 (of course!) was a spur line that went to the park. We took pictures of some public sculpture as well as the Bird's Nest and the Water Cube.






Then we went for lunch. First we went to Wangfujing street to look. We had lamb on a stick (where we suspect the vendor cheated us of change. grrr) and coconut. Neither was all that good, although there was some entertainment value at looking at live scorpions on a stick. We ended up eating at Quanjude Roast Duck restaurant, the original Peking duck restaurant. Very good food there.

Shanghai

Compared to the new Beijing South and the Tianjin train stations, Shanghai's train station seems designed to make taking a trip as hard as possible, with multiple, separate buildings for getting tickets, lines for getting in the station, and multiple wings with waiting areas. And then the Shanghai crowds and subway. This was the first day of the Dragon Boat festival holiday, so there were large crowds at the station. But here as well as on the subway and everywhere else we went, there was an obvious increase in bumps-per-unit-time indicator of social aggressiveness. My best illustration. We had taken a spur line to the transfer point at the end of the line. At the transfer point (the end of the line) we see the people in the station getting ready to get on the train (which is about to empty, since it is the end of the line). And there is no space for all of us to get through. Looking out the door, what follows would be obvious. When the doors open, the whole wall of people outside surges to get in, while everyone in the train trying to get out (which is all of us) surge to get out. And the effect is not dissimilar to a rugby scrum. Right down to my bracing myself for the initial impact. I felt sorry for the poor ai yee behind us, who cried out "aiyaa" as the doors opened and she saw the scrum she needed to get through to get off the train.

Shanghai was with my former roommate S and K and their two sons and two daughters. They live in a complex on Tianshanlu in the west part of the city (by Weininglu station). A in particular seemed to enjoy our visit as she had the unusual experience of having multiple adults with her with no other kids to compete.

After a shower and a bit of rest, S and I took the subway to People's Square. We went to the Shanghai Urban Planning Exhibition Hall, which was dominated by a model of Shanghai, and our introduction to the ubiquious preparations for the 2010 World Expo to be in Shanghai.



Which was indicated in signs and public sculpture all over town. Even in the depths of non-touristy neighborhoods you were faced with the exhortations of 'Better city, Better life' accompanied by the requisite cute mascot.



Next we took the bus to the Yuyuan bazaar (by Yuyuan garden). Very crowded. We had lunch in a food court type place right before that. Nothing exceptional. Next we tried to walk on the Bund. But we soon found out that there was construction along the whole way. So a taxi to Pudong was in order.



We wook a taxi to the Super Brand Mall, near the Oriental Pearl Building. It is the standard 9 story Asian mall catering to the middle class. We walked through there as well as Riverside Park. Dinner was with ST and A at Ding Tai Feng, featuring Xiao Long Tung Bao, their version of steamed buns is characterized by soup inside the bao (meaning you really need to eat the bao whole). ST knows of this from Taiwan, where it was a little hole in the wall. Now, it is something that is moderately upscale in Shanghai and other major cities around the Pacific Rim.



We went up to the 87th floor of the Grand Hyatt to take a quick look at the Shanghai skyline, then went down to the 54th floor where we stopped for coffee. A was enjoying her extended alone time with daddy well past her normal bedtime. And doing some importing things like teaching her guests how to play a driving game on her phone. (Note: while knowing how to go faster is nice, the next major advance is learning how to go left or right).

The next day, S and I went to Qibao, a water town in the west part of Shanghai. Using our guidebooks and the wonders of the internet, we mapped out a route using a combination of subway and buses to get there. Which was followed by asking many people how to find it. An endeavor in which we teamed up with another local couple who was trying to do the same thing. And when we finally found it, we found that there is now a subway stop, right outside the gate. The line is so new that it did not show up on our guidebook maps. Which shows how fast the place is growing.



Qibao is a tourist town. A bit out of the way so not as deadly as Yuyuan Garden, but still close enough to be accessible by public transit (and fewer foreigners). There is a pedestrian mall outside Qibao (where we shopped at a store that was closing globally). At Qibao itself, we got the pass for the touristy spots like the replica merchant house and garden, and the shadow puppet theater.





This was most useful as a quiet place to hide from the crowds in the town (which was probably consistant with the original idea). The main part was full of little shops, of pseudo antiques, food (conventional and more interesting), and other stores. And the canal with boats (after all, this is a canal town). The narrow streets of shops made it very crowded with bustling shoppers, yelling merchants hawking their wares. Creating the purely intentional effect of a crowded old time market (as opposed to the modern mall)


We returned to the T's after lunch, and hung out with the kids for watercoloring and pizza. Then it was on the bullet train back to Tianjin.

This time we took a normal sleeper car instead of first class like we did on the way down. It was not terribly crowded. We were thinking of upgrading to first class, but it turned out we had our 6 bed compartment to ourselves, so we stayed. Our conductor was very amused as we were asking her about how that worked, and she found out that I was American (Your husband is American?! Your English must be very good) In comparison to first class, the normal sleepers had 6 beds instead of 4 and no compartment door. The car as a whole was only about 2/3 full, so it was not terribly loud, but the car got cold overnight as people did not close the car door, leading it getting very cold with the wind going through the car. Someone took one of our extra blankets, and in the morning, there was a lot of sniffling going on in our car. I can see why the Chinese are terrified of Swine Flu. If it got into the passenger train system . . . (or either Golden Week *shudder*) They should just include face masks as part of the ticket price here.

Tianjin final

The last stretch in Tianjin was marked by visits with relatives (who wanted to wait until they were sure I was in China long enough to be sure I was not bringing Swine Flu in from the United States). S's mom's birthday (we got her a cake),



We met with S's schoolfriend L, who is still at the Tianjin Conservatory of Music, getting ready for her Master's recital. She dragged S's parents along with us for lunch at a restaurant in Tianjin that was notable for the many antiques on display along the walls including bells, many Buddha statues (and one idol that S's mother made a point of stopping by, which was for praying for children).



We also had a couple trips to the large pedestrian mall in Tianjin, in our ongoing quest to find S qipao suitible for future galas. S's mom knew of many of the older department stores and dress shops along the way. Some of the other prominent stores: a very large number of wedding studios and wedding companies. Several Li-ann sporting goods stores. I think there was one every 100 meters, just to make sure you saw it. To be sure, there were several Adidas and Nike stores too, but Li-ann was pervasive. (Note: whoever setup Walmart here did an excellent job. Ditto Nike's NBA-China marketing account. Those people deserve whatever they make and I hope they got a good bonus as well.)

QUOTES

Numerous occasions with variations:
When are you going to have kids?

In Beijing:
Look what your friend CL gave me. He played in the Olympics!

To S's mom:
When are you going to America to take care of your grandchildren? (Note: S is an only child)

In Shanghai trying to get to Qibao:
Why are you going to ancient city Qibao instead of the clubs and bars?

Numerous occasions:
He does not look American.

In Shanghai:
ST: We're not going to be contributing to the cause of grandkids. Staying with the T's is worth several months of birth control.

On the train from Shanghai to Tianjin:
He does not look American.
Your husband is American? Your english must be very good.

L in Tianjin:
We have to go to the antiques restaurant. You are our international friend.

I approve. (of me)

Immigration at Dulles International Airport:
What is your profession? (after reviewing my assorted visas)

Conversation topics

When are you going to have kids?

How fast buildings are going up in Tianjin/Beijing/Shanghai

How do you like the restaurants in Beijing?

How does the economic downturn affect you?

The trends in quality of Chinese conservatories.

The raising of children in China (AKA the Lang Lang model of parenting AKA why people our age in China don't want kids)

Tianjin's tourist aircraft carrier restaurant (AKA why you do not buy a ship made by russians)

Children's day!

The need to have pretty girls greeting people at stores/restaurants/etc. (AKA when you have 1.5 billion people, it is not too hard to find pretty girls to be greeters/hostesses.)

Global warming (AKA everyone in China believes in Global Warming, because no emporor of China would build his capital in the dessert (Beijing) )

A Week in the Valley - New Market, VA

Our honeymoon was spent in New Market. When we told people that we were going there, the usual response was "Where is that?" And then we told people that it was in the Shenandoah Valley. Which apparently was not particularly helpful. :-)

Our home for the week was the Crossroads Inn in New Market, a Bed & Breakfast, where we stayed in the Blue Room.




Properly named, it is at the crossroads US 11 and US 211. Or to give it a more geographical location, the old Valley Pike off the New Market Gap. The New Market Gap is the historical reason for the town's existance, as it provides an entryway into the valley through the Blue Ridge Mountains on the east. We picked it because we wanted a home base in the Valley, and we wanted to stay in a small town. And it turned out the New Market Gap/US 211 led to the most convenient entryway into the Shenandoah National Park for us (see earlier posting).



We did spend considerable time going up and down the Valley going to Vineyards. But we also spent much time in the New Market area as well. This included whitewater canoeing on the Shenandoah River near Luray, and the town Fourth of July Parade and fireworks.







The Civil War New Market Battlefield was right next to town, complete with museum staffed with very enthusiastic Virginia Military Institute cadets.





Disclaimer: I did not pick the town of New Market. I merely provided a list of several suitable towns in the Shenandoah Valley to my now wife, and she picked the town. And she did a very good job.

We also sampled several of the town restaurants, including Southern Kitchen (where we played Kenny Chesney "How Forever Feels" on the Jukebox. The steak was a bit too well done), The Congress Publik House (the tamarind pork was real good) and Jalesco (a surprisingly good mexican restaurant).

But the fun part about going to a honeymoon in a small town was the hospitality and attention we got. The B&B provided many good conversations over both breakfast and afternoon wine and cheese (especially when people figured out we were a honeymooning couple). Several coaches from the local college summer baseball league team were staying there as well as parents of the boys, which provided good conversation on the development of young men. People got used to seeing a young asian couple strolling down the street. The lady at the local chamber of commerce gushed over us when we stopped by. During the parade and the picnic we were regularly congratulated and wished best of luck for our marriage. Strangers said 'hello' and 'good morning' on the sidewalks. Very hospitable place. And a lot of this is probably the fact, they don't have very many pure tourists staying at the town, so they don't get so jaded. And we got a lot of attention wherever we went, more so then any high-end resort or hotel or cruise could have given. And it was a more enjoyable, less pressured time than any other we could have imagined.

During our time in the Valley, we frequently were asked by townspeople or winery owners where were we staying. And when we told them the Crossroads Inn, they immediately knew where we were staying, and who the owners were. Because, it turns out, the owner, and the person who was cooking and serving our breakfast, changing our sheets, lover of wines, had another identity. How many other newlyweds were served breakfast by the town mayor?



On July 5, all of us at breakfast expressed our delight at learning this during the parade the day before. One of life's little pleasures. And another memory for our honeymoon.